Between Jobs

I am between jobs at the moment, and I’m finding myself feeling very weirdly “out of sorts”.  I should be happy.  For one of the first times in my life, I can afford to take a little time and figure out exactly what I want to do.  But I’m having a hard time feeling inspired.  When I think of working a Monday through Friday type of job (typical 8 am to 5 pm), I literally feel like part of my soul is dying.  I am so so so so (can I say again?) SO sick of that schedule.  It’s always the same; dreading Mondays, wishing for Fridays, to me just pure drudgery.  Unfortunately, when I see a job that I’m qualified for, or that pays what I’d like to make, it almost always falls into this category.

I’ve honestly enjoyed jobs I’ve had in retail, in the past, that had more flexible schedules.  I’ve never minded working nights or weekends, and I liked having days off during the week when it seemed like everybody else was working.  It just seems to be hard to find a good one of these types of jobs.  If I lived in a bigger city, maybe it would be possible, but around here…not so much.

Then I think, Wow, I finally have time to do some writing!  but can’t think of anything to write about or anything important to say:  hence this silly piece.  Autumn has begun and it’s still sweltering hot outside.  I live in Central time and it gets dark way too early.  I’m thinking of changing from being a night owl to an early bird; just to change things up a bit. I could go on walks in the morning instead of in the evening.  It’s starting to get too scary because it gets dark too early.  I’m not scared of the dark, far from it – the darkness is my friend!  It’s some of the people out there that give me the creeps!  Daylight would help.

That’s about all I can think of to say right now.  I will go do yoga and try to figure out what to do with the rest of my life….

To Be Continued.

 

 

 

 

 

Advertisements

Moonshine Cherries

You’ve got those moonshine cherries

burst in my mouth

have ‘em when I need ‘em

make me think of the South

 

Just like that sparkle in your eye

their moon-time shine

burns a trail of fire

as if by design

 

All warmth and glow

cherries in a jar

black molasses slow

white lightnin’ from afar

 

Kickin’ in again

kisses sweet as pie

all my heart’s desire

Honey, that’s no lie

The Blood Energizer Stone: Bloodstone — Good Witches Homestead

The combined colors of bloodstone allow it to function at the levels of the base and heart chakras. It encourages a balance of energy; practicality with the desire to grow; calming strong emotions, and is both stimulating and motivating. Bloodstone is also known as heliotrope and has a long tradition of magical use. A variety […]

via The Blood Energizer Stone: Bloodstone — Good Witches Homestead

American Dream

An achievement – the American Dream

now what?

One door just barely came open; another one shut

 

There will always be that once upon a time:

days of carefree abandon were mine

the things that I had did not define ~

 

and a long empty road stretched out in front of me,

traded Big Sky of the west for South’s tranquility.

The simplest of choices:  the mountains or the sea?

All the while, wasting time thinking about some punk

all that I owned fit in my back seat and trunk

 

Were the scorching sun and heat enough to wash it away

then I wouldn’t be here to this very day

just a far-flung soul

with constant trials and tolls

on a pursuit; seeking to find the best way

 

Sometimes the only solution

is to leave the situation.

These people are not my friends

and the search never ends…

Evening Owl

On a balmy night, you’re in my sight

on the highest tree branch, you alight

whispering winds stroke ruffled wings

hearing your wind-swept call, my senses delight

 

A stranger who comes but once a year

you’re a portent of luck, though in some cause fear

russet raptor of doom gazing down on tombs

your intentions remain unclear

 

On widow-making branches you linger

hovering above necropolis, the bringer

of a serene surprise, most will not realize

invader from another realm; the ultimate infringer

 

For it is not from this world you come

no, from somewhere dreams are undone

and I welcome you here, my clever seer

and to your spectral customs I succumb

 

Just as the black cat who crosses my path will bring good luck

in your nightly visits and wily ways, I am moonstruck

and in the cemetery where I walk there is no need for talk

it is a peaceful place for clearing our minds and souls from muck

 

And when stars shimmer across ebony skies

always at home in the shadows are you and I

furiously fighting against the wind, tormented hearts undisciplined

to the ways of a world we will never fit in

taking comfort in the awakening of our eyes

knowing the time is over for deceit and lies.

 

 

 

Transient – Like it’s a dirty word

bohemian caravan

I was once accused of being transient.  Transient – like it was a dirty word.

I looked around at what I had back then.  A second floor apartment in a white stucco building downtown.  A TV, a lawn chair for a chair, a lamp and an end table or two, a bed, a keyboard with bench and stand, and a couple kitchen items.  The apartment was was simple and clean; newly remodeled.  The kitchen appliances were brand new and rarely, if ever, used.  In the evenings, palm fronds brushed against my windows, creating pretty silhouettes in the shadows.  There was a coffee shop right across the street (Mother’s Milk I think it was called) where they had live entertainment in the evenings sometimes, and I could hear it from my windows.  It made me feel like I was part of something, whether I went there or not. I made friends with a mechanic in the shop across the street, who invited me to his more inland house when there was a hurricane threat.  A Turkish man owned the gas station next door and had great prices on wine.  I could walk, rollerblade, or ride my bike most places.  

When I moved there, everything I owned fit in my car.  The car was a Grand Marquis (I forget the year), so it was pretty roomy.  But I still had one of those cartop carrier thingies on top that I think I put clothes in.  In my travels, one of the straps had broken and I literally drove with my driver window open, holding that strap, across several states because I couldn’t figure out a way to fix it.  

Joe was this guy I met back then.  He was a furniture builder and also a doorman/bouncer who worked the door at a nearby club.  He was okay.  I think he liked me more than I liked him.  One afternoon not long after I met him, he told me that he had just recently gotten out of jail in Texas.  I can’t remember for what.  Anyway, he had this thing for dressing nice and being “classy” and having nice and classy things.  One day, he looked around my apartment and made a comment along the lines of, “it looks like a transient lives here.”  It wasn’t so much what he said; it was more how he said it that made me feel weird.  

Why do some people feel the need to judge others so harshly?  Especially based on what they have or how they live?  Did it ever occur to this guy that I had just moved cross country, by myself, and started all over again with no place to live and no job?  I packed what I could carry and brought it, but that was it.  Within days I had a job and it wasn’t much longer till I found my apartment.  No, I did not immediately wrack up a credit card just so I could get a bunch of impressive furniture.  I’ve never liked to spend beyond my means, and I usually stick with just what I need.  I’d say that’s smart and not something to be ashamed of.  

As far as transient goes?  Hey, I never promised to be permanent.